90+ Funny Vampire Puns & Vampire Jokes LaffGaff


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1 Copy The vampire is an outsider. He's the perfect metaphor for those things. He's someone who looks human and sounds human, but is not human, so he's always on the margins. Anne Rice 2 Copy A starving child is a frightful sight. A starving vampire, even worse. Anne Rice 2 Copy


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Summit Entertainment. This New Moon greeting lives rent-free in my head in the worst possible way. 6. "I guess the wolf's out of the bag." Summit Entertainment. Wah-wahhhhhh. 7. "Stop trying to.


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"Mom. I have something to tell you. I'm undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I'm here to tell you that undead are just like you and me. well, okay. Possibly more like me than you." โ€• Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes


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Lifestyle 20 Vampire Quotes to Get You in the Bloodsucking Spirit for Halloween Let the festivities begin with these sayings from iconic movies and books. By Kristen Adaway Published: Jul 13,.


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Angelina Jolie "When other little girls wanted to be ballet dancers I kind of wanted to be a vampire." Patricia Briggs, River Marked "He was like Superman, but with fangs and oddly impaired morals." Stephenie Meyer, Breaking Dawn "I took mythology a lot more seriously since I'd become a vampire." Holly Black "Into every generation comes a vampire."


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Devil, Fool, Lestat 102 Copy quote Show source I was a newborn vampire, weeping at the beauty of the night. Anne Rice Night, Newborn, Rebirth 8 Copy quote Show source That morning I was not yet a vampire, and I saw my last sunrise. I remember it completely, and yet I can't recall any sunrise before it.


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1. You can't ever get the attention of a vampire on Halloween. They're way too busy looking for their necks victim. 2. A vampire can't be a comedian. They just aren't funny, and worst of all they always know they suck. 3. I met the child of a snowman and a vampire. He was suffering from a serious case of frostbite. 4.


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Angelina Jolie "Bring a vampire around, people start discovering religion." Richard Laymon, The Stake "I took mythology a lot more seriously since I'd become a vampire." Stephenie Meyer, Breaking Dawn "The strength of the vampire is that people will not believe in him." Garrett Fort "I'm going to talk to her.""And how's that going to go?


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"Meredith: Tell me that is not a bomb. Damon: Okay, it's a kitten. It's an adorable, exploding kitten." โ€” "The Vampire Diaries" A photo of Damon Salvatore with the quote, "I don't do the big brother thing very well, so I don't have any milk and cookies to offer you." | Source: Facebook/thevampirediaries Damon Salvatore Being Quite Frank


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1. What is Dracula's favorite coffee order? Decoffinated. 2. What would you get when you cross a vampire with sheep? Drac-Ewe-La. 3. Why did Dracula divorce his wife after she took a blood test? She wasn't his type. 4. Why does Dracula always read the best-reviewed newspaper? Someone told him it had good circulation. 5.


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Parents Quotes Collections 108 The Vampire Diaries Quotes That All Fans Will Love FOR ALL AGES 108 The Vampire Diaries Quotes That All Fans Will Love 'The Vampire Diaries' series is based on a book written by L. J. Smith with the same name. At one time, 'The Vampire Diaries' was the most-watched series on television.


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A: For their coffin. Can't let that coffin flu catch on. Q: What is said by an infant vampire before going to sleep? A: "Switch off the light. I'm fearful of the light." Q: What kind of soup vampires like the most? A: Scream of tomato. Spooky and delicious! Q: What is eaten by vampires for breakfast?


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From funny vampire captions that'll have you cackling in your coffins to romantic mood shots that bleed love, this list has something for every undead heart out there.. Here are some vampire movie quotes that make perfect Instagram captions. "I may be undead, but my style is killer. - The Vampire Diaries" "I am forever. - Twilight"


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I'm not a vampire, I'm a vampire rockstar. Creepin' it real with the vampires. Why are you being so cryptic? It's not the size of your fangs, it's how you bite. I'm not undead, I'm just undead in love. I'm fang-girling over here. Funny Vampire Captions